Types of Abuse

There are a many types of abuse, here is a brief explanation of some of them:

Physical Abuse

Physical abuse is any intentional and unwanted contact with you or something close to your body.

Some examples of physical abuse are:

  • Scratching, punching, biting, strangling or kicking.
  • Throwing something at you such as a phone, book, shoe or plate.
  • Pulling your hair.
  • Pushing or pulling you.
  • Grabbing your clothing.
  • Grabbing you to prevent you from leaving or to force you to go somewhere.

Emotional Abuse

Emotional abuse includes non-physical behaviors such as threats, insults, constant monitoring or “checking in,” excessive texting, humiliation, intimidation, isolation or stalking.

Some examples of emotional abuse are:

  • Calling you names and putting you down.
  • Yelling and screaming at you.
  • Intentionally embarrassing you in public.
  • Preventing you from seeing or talking with friends and family.
  • Telling you what to do and wear.
  • Damaging your property when they’re angry (throwing objects, punching walls, kicking doors, etc.)
  • Blaming your actions for their abusive or unhealthy behavior.
  • Threatening to commit suicide to keep you from breaking up with them.
  • Threatening to harm you, your pet or people you care about.
  • Making you feel guilty or immature when you don’t consent to sexual activity.
  • Threatening to have your children taken away.

Sexual Abuse

Sexual abuse refers to any action that pressures or coerces someone to do something sexually they don’t want to do.

Some examples of sexual abuse are:

  • Unwanted kissing or touching.
  • Unwanted rough or violent sexual activity.
  • Rape or attempted rape.
  • Refusing to use condoms or restricting someone’s access to birth control.
  • Threatening someone into unwanted sexual activity.
  • Pressuring or forcing someone to have sex or perform sexual acts.
  • Using sexual insults toward someone.

Financial Abuse

Financial abuse can be very subtle — telling you what you can and cannot buy or requiring you to share control of your bank accounts.

Some examples of financial abuse are:

  • Giving you an allowance and closely watching what you buy.
  • Placing your wages in their account and denying you access to it.
  • Keeping you from seeing shared bank accounts or records.
  • Forbidding you to work or limiting the hours you do.
  • Preventing you from going to work i.e. by taking your car or keys.
  • Getting you fired by harassing you, your employer or coworkers on the job.
  • Maxing out your credit cards without your permission.
  • Refusing to give you money for food, rent, medicine or clothing.
  • Spending money on themselves but not allowing you to do the same.

Coercive control

A pattern of intimidation, degradation, isolation and control with the use or threat of physical or sexual violence.

Some examples of coercive control are:

  • Unreasonable demands.
  • Degradation.
  • Restricting daily activities.
  • Threats or intimidation.
  • Financial control.
  • Monitoring of time.
  • Taking your phone away.
  • Deprivation of food.
  • Destruction of possessions.

Digital Abuse

Digital abuse is the use of technologies such as texting and social networking to bully, harass, stalk or intimidate a partner. Often this behaviour is a form of verbal or emotional abuse perpetrated online.

Some examples of digital abuse are:

  • Tells you who you can or can’t be friends with on Facebook and other sites.
  • Sends you negative, insulting or threatening emails, Facebook messages, tweets, direct messages or other messages online.
  • Uses sites like Facebook, Twitter, foursquare and others to keep constant tabs on you.
  • Puts you down in their status updates.
  • Sends you unwanted, explicit pictures and/or demands you send some in return.
  • Pressures you to send explicit video or sexts.
  • Steals or insists to be given your passwords.
  • Constantly texts you and makes you feel like you can’t be separated from your phone for fear that you will be punished.
  • Looks through your phone frequently, checks up on your pictures, texts and outgoing calls.
  • Tags you unkindly in pictures on Instagram, Tumblr, etc.

Testimonials

  • "I have found the support from Southern Domestic Abuse Service life saving for me. Without the support I couldn't imagine how my family and I could have moved on with our lives. I am eternally grateful for all your support both emotionally and advisory. I have gained so much more self worth from your help. Thank you from the bottom of my heart." Sandra

  • "I have found the support from Southern Domestic Abuse Service life saving for me. Without the support I couldn't imagine how my family and I could have moved on with our lives. I am eternally grateful for all your support both emotionally and advisory. I have gained so much more self worth from your help. Thank you from the bottom of my heart." Kerrie

  • "From the circumstances I left behind, I have felt safe living in this house. I have had good times and bad, but I am really grateful for all of your help, you have provided me with. Thank you." Ruth

  • "Thank you SDAS for teaching me how to play the game. I am back in control of my life and my self esteem." Donna